


The calm that helps the storm

by CauseofDeath



Category: Spider-Man: Homecoming (2017)
Genre: Angst, Anxiety, Anxiety Attacks, Comfort, F/M, Hurt/Comfort, Mj is a softie, Panic Attacks, Peter Parker Needs a Hug, Precious Peter Parker, Protectiveness
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-10-19
Updated: 2018-10-19
Packaged: 2019-08-04 15:09:44
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,464
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16349039
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/CauseofDeath/pseuds/CauseofDeath
Summary: Peter’s just having a real bad day. (It gets better though.)





	The calm that helps the storm

**Author's Note:**

> Trigger Warning: Descriptive explanation of what it’s like to have an anxiety attack.

**_Peter_**

It was normal day, it was supposed to be a normal day. Why wasn't today a normal day.

It started off normal enough, he woke up late, nearly missed his bus, his aunt made him lunch with an embarrassing note to accompany it, and Ned met him at his locker just like he does every morning talking about their next movie night, he felt okay, he felt happy.

But then it changed.

He started to feel it after lunch, the uneasy feeling in his chest. He passed it off as nerves at first, after all he did have a test in fifth period it was probably just that. But it wasn't.

It started off small, the sickness growing in his stomach as his hand drummed rapidly on the desk, the sound of the chairs scraping and the pens clicking piercing through his ears. He gripped his desk hoping it could help tether him to reality. _Not now, Please not now._

His teacher was talking but he couldn't hear what he was saying, the sounds of the class was all but drowned out by the sound of blood in his ears. The thoughts in his head accelerated. He wanted it to slow down so he could breathe but it wouldn't. His breaths coming out as gasps, he felt like he was going to black out. His heart was hammering so hard inside his chest felt like it was trying to jump out. The room spun in his head like a whirlwind, he gripped harder on the desk trying to make everything slow down to something his brain and body could cope with. He felt so sick. He could fell the classroom getting smaller, trapping him from existence. It was all too overwhelming, he had to get out, he had to breathe.

Peter sprung from his chair and grabbed his bags, he couldn't stay here any longer. He couldn't think any longer. When he reached the door he started to run, the sound of his teachers yells getting lost in the distance.

He didn't know where he was going all he knew is he had to breathe, he slumped down on one of the walls in the corridor trying to catch his breath. He wanted to go home but it was too far away, it's too far away, it's too far away. He needed help, but he didn't know who to call, what's their number, who too call, too far away, he's going, he went, breathe, gone, what number, too far away... blackness... creeping blackness... he's on the floor in a ball- the foetal position. Where is he, what's his name, who to call, what's the number, the stairs are too steep, the room is spinning...blackness...he's gone...

**_Michelle_**

Walking through the corridors while reading with one hand and balancing hot tea, a bagel and her backpack with the other, multitasking was an art form and Michelle, well she can proudly say she mastered it.

She can’t blame herself, women where natural multitaskers, blame it on her biology. Now the reason she was walking through the corridors when she should be in class was a different story.

You see Michelle was observant she knew that. That was her thing, like how jocks were stupid, or nerds were smart, she was a loner that knew everything about everyone. It was her trade mark. She would spend hours just watching people learning who they are, how they act. It was one of her favourite past times. So that’s how this fateful morning she knew something was wrong with Peter, the, cute, kind, brunette boy that would constantly invade her brain.

It's not like she was obsessed with him or anything, she just happened to notice that he was more flustered than normal, wasn't as responsive as he usually was and when he ran out of Trigonometry, well that raised a few red flags.

Who can blame her if she was just a little bit worried and it wasn't like she was looking for him or anything, she just happened to feel the need to walk through the corridor because her classes sucked, and she usually did it anyway, it was just a coincidence she was going down the same direction Peter did minutes ago, just a coincidence.

**_Peter_**

Darkness, spreading sickening darkness, that’s all he could see, that’s all feel but then he felt it warmth.  
He felt the warmth first.

Hands, they were second, the comfort showing him how to breathe.

A Voice, _her_ voice was third, it sounded quiet at first like she was underwater, she was saying something, a name, name, _his_ name.

_Peter..._

_Peter..._

She kept saying it _Peter._

_You need to listen to my voice, focus on my voice._

Her voice, Michelle, Mj, her voice.

She was here, why was she here?

Voice, her calm voice.

"Peter, take my hand." He did.

They were walking, stairs, a turn, walking, a door it was metal, big, loud, metal, more stairs, air he could feel air, fresh, cold, freeing air.

**_Michelle_**

She gently lowered Peter down against an old sky light facing him towards the view.

Michelle loved it up here. The roof. It was her special place, she would sit up here when she was worried or tense, just her, her sketch book and the Queens.

She turned her attention back to Peter, pulling his hands into her own as she crouched in front of him. The boy looked around frantically, eyes radiating panic.

"Hey Peter, It's Michelle, look at me, Peter look at me, you're okay." She pushed his head gently his soft brown coloured orbs locking with hers like she was the anchor tethering him to reality.

"You're going to be okay."

The young girl carefully skimmed her thumb up and down the palm of his hand, she continued to whisper comforting phrases to him, soft nothings to help him calm down. Her mother used to do the same when she got scared as a child, it always seemed to do the trick for her.

It also seemed to be the same for Peter as slowly but surely, he submitted to the touch and relaxed for the first time in what felt like days, leaning into the cold metal surface of the skylight.

He took slow, tiny breaths and kept his eyes closed until his lungs opened up and his body started to relax. Swallowing hard, he let out a slow, shaky breath.

"It's all right now," Mj told him, her fingers softly grazing the palms of his hands radiating warmth through him.

"You're safe now. It's over." His breathing slowly returned to normal, immersing himself in the comforting feeling of her hands on his.

"I thought they'd stopped," He breathed when he finally gained the ability to speak relatively normally, leaning his head back and dragging a hand through his soft hair. "I really did. I was doing so well—the therapy was working, I was able to logic myself out of these situations, but...I don’t know, today was really bad."

"Tell me what happened." Michelle prompted gently, positioning herself next to him against the skylight, brushing her soft brown curls behind her ear.

"I was in class today, I thought I was okay but everything-and it just got so overwhelming I couldn't focus. I tried to leave, I tried to calm myself down but..." Peter brought a shaky hand to his face and sighed.

"You couldn't control it," Michelle finished for him.

"I couldn't control it," Peter repeated. "If I can't control my own mind, what do I do? So that...well, it made me remember my last one and..." Michelle sighed.

"I get it, I used to have panic attacks too. Still do actually. It sucks, when you feel so useless against your own brain."

"That's why I took you here actually. The roof, my roof. This is where I come when I need to calm down. I just find the sounds; the view kind of help bring me back you know. I thought you might have needed it with the state you were in and all." She chuckled lightly.

He looked around again really taking in the sight this time, absorbing its beauty. He took a deep breath and looked out at the horizon.

"It's amazing."

She slowly leaned in more, pushing herself against his shoulder.

"I know." They watched as the Students poured out of the school, like mobs of small ants.

"Do we have to leave?" He asked quietly, she smiled.

"Not if you don't want to. How long do you wanna stay?" He turned to her with a soft smile, tilting his head just a little.

"Till the sun sets." She pushed herself closer to him.  
"You got yourself a deal Parker."


End file.
